Follow in my Footsteps by Murphy Doodle

 i do not understand women or mothers who walk on two legs, there I said it!

today, while jack was reading the paper on the back porch he left his room open for me, which was nice, he normally doesn't let me in unless he is there, but best of all i found a new chew that he left out for me, so, i took it to letty's studio where she was on the computer listening to people talk, i must have done something wrong because she grabbed the toy from my mouth and said I needed to go see jack, luckily, jack and I are friends so i ran ahead of her to see jack, then

 i was still in trouble from last night, which wasn't my fault, last night they left me alone outside for hours, like half of my life went by yesterday and I was alone, no one to play with and I wanted to run and chase the ball and jump in someone's lap and be loved on the swing, but no, they went to a ball game and left me alone. they know i love games with balls that i can chase.

so, I sniffed out a bottle that was left on the outside table, it smelled like fish and just the day before I smelled sardines at a table, julie was eating them and i  really liked that smell, so I decided to bite the bottle and see if I could taste the fish. it took me all evening to roll the bottle, bite the bottle and finally bite and chewed enough to unscrew the lid.  it was awful awful tasting fish oil, one taste was enough but why did my mother leave it outside for me to drink if she didn't want me to have it?

see why i don't understand women

now she keeps giving me baths and washes my face, she says i smell like an alley cat

this is what got me in trouble first, and before that there was the book I chewed up, jack's soxs and a matching pair of shoes. why not chew on both so they look the same, i thought. the rugs weren't very good and they gagged me which made letty and jack grab me and pull a long string out of my mouth.

always before when i did something wrong letty rubbed my nose in it or shook a rattle that scared me, but this time with the little glasses she drug me across the room and made me see the error of my ways

"Go ahead a confess," she just told me, "tell them what else you've chewed up." 

a pillow

the garden hose piece that sprays water

pretty green plants with pink flowers

maybe a glove i found in the garden

locust and toads

newspapers

magazines

something off the kitchen table that made you mad

my harness that was too loose

a blanket corner that was in my way

"Thank you Murphy. You are still a good dog and you make us laugh and play everyday."

now i am grounded and i like this because i don't get to be outside without jack or letty to watch me until the smell of dead fish is gone. i like being grounded with people.  

this is me Messy Murphy, my name gets changed everyday, 
sometimes they call me goof ball, or howler when i
howl at the sirens on saturday, doodle bug, or curly
 because i like commas and have curly hair and more i 
can't think of right now, i am hungry
the end

We are the proud parents of
a puppy who can behave
in public with good
manners, 
sometimes.